SONNY HAYES is COOLER THAN YOU
A few facts about Brad Pitt's character in F1
In F1, Brad Pitt plays Sonny Hayes, and he might be the all-time coolest character ever.
How Cool? Here are just a few things we know about him.
He doesn’t race for prizes he races for the feeling.
He doesn’t have a house, he lives in Camper van.
He understands and speaks fluent Minion.
He orders a plain vanilla ice cream in a cup with a side of oreos and it turns itself into a McFlurry.
He’s never bought a shirt. Clothes just appear in his bag.
Sonny’s AirPods Max never run out of charge.
He’s never used a tissue. No need.
He gave his Doctor a pep talk during his own spinal surgery.
No matter how hard he tries, his buttons won’t button. They just hang there, trembling, terrified to interrupt his chest.
He always picks the right line at the airport.
He always knows what to do with his hands in pictures.
At 61 years old. He’s only spoken 2,440 words in his lifetime — that’s roughly 400 words a year. Most of them were “drive,” “leave it,” or “nope.” But each person he’s ever spoken to says he touched their heart with his words.
Every time he smiles, a woman in Italy gets a divorce.
He always orders dessert for the table.
He had a Lou Boo Boo before any of you.
He sweats cologne (that is perfectly balanced and never overpowering.)
Like a Vampire, he doesn’t show up in Mirrors, but that's because the Mirrors can’t handle his hotness.
ATMs give him money just for looking at them.
He’s never sent an email or heard a podcast.
He never gets more than a 5 o’clock shadow. His beard naturally retreats every morning.
He only has one Led Zeppelin Album on his Phone.
He raw dogs every flight.
The only movie he’s seen is Creed 2 and thinks it’s pretty fuking cool.
He bought one magazine as a teenager, and he’s still reading it.
Let me know what other facts you find about Sonny Hayes if you see F1 this weekend