What You Missed at Comic-Con (On Purpose)
From Connect 4 the Movie to an Animated Reservoir Dogs Reboot
This weekend I was at San Diego Comic-Con, and while the big panels got all the attention, here are the ones I couldn’t stop thinking about.
Hungry Hungry Hippos
Reimagined as biomechanical creatures fighting dietary control in a dystopian marshland. Timothy Chalamet voices “Rage Hippo.” Florence Pugh plays a nutritionist who betrays the herd.
Connect Four: The Vertical War
Keanu Reeves stars in this post-apocalyptic saga where survivors must literally connect four safe zones to establish trade routes. The villains drop red discs from helicopters.
“Sometimes you have to connect to disconnect,”
Die Hard: Mutual Threat
On a layover at LAX, Zeus Carver (Samuel L. Jackson) sees Holly Gennero, ex-wife of the late John McClane, get kidnapped at baggage claim. Recognizing the name Zeus can’t find anyone to listen but after he’s arrested, he demands a meeting with Al Powell (Reginald VelJohnson), now the no-nonsense Mayor of Los Angeles, who confirms the worst: someone’s targeting anyone connected to McClane. Enter Holly’s kids—Lucy McClane (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), now a Homeland Security negotiator, and her estranged brother Jack (Jai Courtney), an off-grid ex-operative. Their only shot at finding Holly means turning to Matthew Farrell (Justin Long), Lucy’s ex and a burned-out hacker who still blames himself for everything that happened in 2007. The team unravels a plot to erase the McClane legacy, they discover the story is already being twisted by conspiracy pundits—led by none other than Richard Thornburg (William Atherton), now an unhinged truth-streaming news relic pushing “The McClane Myth.”
Gummi Bears: Blood Legacy (Netflix)
“They used to bounce here and there and everywhere. Now they just run.”
Set 300 years after the Great Sugar Wars, the last surviving Gummi Bear clan lives in hiding beneath the decaying ruins of Castle Dunwyn, hunted for the precious gummiberry juice now used exclusively by the ruling elite to maintain control over the fractured kingdoms of Carboria.
“We were the stuff of bedtime stories. Now we’re just bedtime warnings.” - Gruffi (Ben Mendelsohn)
Reservoir Puppies (MGM+)
Tarantino produces. Wes Anderson directs. Six talking shelter dogs plan a heist on a PetSmart, and someone’s not housebroken. The remaining cast return to voice their characters.
Nice Pup Eddie: C’mon, share that treat.
Mr. Pink: Uh-uh. I don’t share
Nice Pup Eddie: You don’t share?
Mr. Pink: Nope. I don’t believe in it.
Nice Pup Eddie: You don’t believe in treat-sharing?
Mr. Blue: You know how hungry I am?
Mr. Pink: Don’t give me that. If you want a treat, earn one.
Inspector Gadget: Flesh & Bone (Lionsgate)
Directed by David Cronenberg, this body horror finds our once cheerful cyborg public servant, John Gadget, is now a defective, state-issued relic of a failed 2030s police automation program. Abandoned by the city that commissioned him. Gadget wanders the neon slums of Metrovale—his body breaking down, his mind glitching, his gadgets… unreliable.
One moment, he’s deploying a grappling hook. The next? A buzz saw goes through his own thigh. “Go-go-Gadget… help me.”
Before Sunrise: Unread (A24)
A modern retelling of Before Sunrise where two strangers (Jacob Elordi + Rachel Sennott) almost fall in love—if they could stop scrolling. They’re in the same city, the same café, even the same subway car… but never notice each other because they’re too busy doomscrolling, drafting threads they’ll never post, and checking their ex’s location.
Light in the Attic (of My Mind)
In the style of Curb Your Enthusiasm, we follow reclusive poet Shel Silverstein as he tries to live a “normal life”. Features original verses and plenty of uncomfortable silences. Shot in black-and-white.
Tribal Council (Disney+)
An Ewok workplace comedy set in the administrative heart of Endor’s forest bureaucracy. Wicket is Chief of Moss Resources, but he’s drowning in paperwork, sap quotas, and inter-village HR disputes. Think Parks & Rec meets Planet of the Apes, but smaller and more friendly and with songs.
I also heard rumblings of SON OF THE MASK’S SON: ODIN’S REVENGE, which returns Jim Carrey and Cameron Diaz to the Franchise and posits what would happen if the Mask’s Son had a Son and they all had powers.
Too many of these seem like plausible media
Somebody kickstarter that reservoir puppy's idea, I will give it all of my money.