Wonky Wonka, Calypso Gilligan & 18 Survivors

THING 1: Wonky

As a parent, weekends are scary. You are often faced with filling 24 of your 48 hours with things to keep your kids entertained, so if you saw an ad like this….

You’d be 100% in. But imagine showing up and getting this instead…

The Experience

Watch a Video Walkthrough

This is what families in Glasgow got this week when they showed up for Willy’s Chocolate Experience. This is the Frye Fest of children’s events. The only thing that would make this better would be Ja Rule as Willy.

Every photo is a meme for failure. For example, “THE CANDY STATION”

Children only got 1 Jelly Bean per Child.

Since the event, workers have spoken out.

The Staff

Mr Connell (one of 3 Wonkas) said. “The script was 15 pages of AI-generated gibberish of me just monologuing these mad things. The bit that got me was where I had to say, ‘There is a man we don’t know his name. We know him as the Unknown. This Unknown is an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls.’

The UNKNOWN

“[The Unknown] was terrifying for the kids. Is he an evil man who makes chocolate or is the chocolate itself evil? At the end of my monologue, I was supposed to suck up the Unknown Man with a vacuum cleaner. I asked them if they had a vacuum cleaner and they said, ‘yeah, we haven’t really got there yet, so just improvise’”

Obviously, children were upset, patrons revolted and they called the cops.

All of this forced an apology from the event organizer Billy Coull, who has been discovered as an author who releases AI-generated books like this:

While Billy promises a refund, People still haven’t gotten their money back nor have the workers been paid.

THING 2: ALT GILLIGAN

I was just on LITERALLY with Rob Lowe, and he turned me on to this alternative theme song for Gilligan’s Island. In this Calypso version, there is so much exposition, and while it is not perfect, I love the coffee bit and I love how vague some of the castaways were “two secretaries” and “a teacher”..

THING 3: Judge a Book by Its Cover

Survivor 46 is here. Let's do a pool PICK THE WINNER based purely on Ep 1 and/or just these pictures...The contest closes before Ep 2. Based on this picture (before watching Ep 1 ), I believe Bhanu will win. What do you think?

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WHAT ELSE IS NEW

This week on Unspooled, we are talking about DUNE

I’m doing a Virtual Signing with Premiere Collectibles on May 22

How Did This Get Made?! will be in London, Glasgow, Belfast, and Dublin.